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I sit in a bar nearby and start riffling through pictures, putting my fate in the hands of the Tinder Gods.
After about fifteen minutes, I recognise a friend on it. We're both surprised to find the other one on there. Saturday I wake up in my cold and blameless bed alone.
The remark was a jibe at President Trump who announced plans earlier this year to withdraw America from the deal.
If he follows through with his promise, which is not due to be ratified until 2020, it would make America the only country in the world outside of the pledge.
I walk home and ready myself for another night warming my own sheets without company.
Barack Obama took a thinly veiled dig at Donald Trump on Friday as he addressed a leadership summit in India.
The 44th President, who helped pen the Paris Climate Agreement which he signed in 2015, said there has been 'a pause in American leadership' on the issue.
Almost against my own will, I reach for my phone and start swiping. It takes a while (you have to put the time in with online dating, and Tinder is no different), but I eventually manage to arrange a date with a pretty lady for Sunday afternoon. We have a lovely chat in the sun about online dating, hookup apps, all the rest of it.
She tells me a hair raising story about accidentally flirting with two brothers through Tinder at the same time. It turns out she has another date later on that evening - I'm merely one in a parade of meet-ups.
War-torn Syria became the last of 197 nations, including North Korea, to sign on to the deal earlier this month.